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If you were'nt real
I would make you up
So I got the job :) I got the call on Friday and yep I have the job. I start next monday. I also have to do some orientation thing on Thursday and Friday, which will suck because I should be going to school those days, but yeah I have to do it.

So because I got the new job I had to quit my current one. I was working all weekend and all I could think about was how I would be leaving really soon, but I didn't say anything to anyone. I went into see my old manager today and it was really hard telling her. We get along so well and she really is one of the nicest people ever. I felt so bad because she has been so stressed out lately and I don't think she has any idea that I had been looking for another job.

I also managed to spend around $250 today when my friend and I went shopping, this was very naughty but I wanted to get some new stuff to wear to my new work and I don't think I'll get another chance to go shopping before I start. I really need to learn how to resist buying so much stuff though, once I get started I just can't stop.

Current Mood: okay okay

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So I've been back at tafe for 3 days now. I really like it so far! There's a girl in my class who I went to high school with, we were never friends but we have sort of clung to each other lol. Oh and there's plenty of other girls around my age in my class and we're all starting to kind of become friends which is pretty good. So far I've had 3 classes and there already seems to be a lot of work, which kind of excites me, I know it sounds weird but I wanted to be challenged and have a lot to do.

Today I had a job interview for a sales assistant job in a department store, I think it went well. You know when you can't really be sure because there's some things you wish you hadn't said lol. She asked me heaps of questions and I think I might of come off as a bit ditzy in some parts but I did try my best. I had to miss a class for it so I'm really hoping for the best as the hours would be perfect. I will know by this time next week, ah I hate waiting, oh well if I don't get it I guess it wasn't meant to be.

Oh how was everyone's valentines day? I got pretty spoilt, Dave bought me a rose, 2 boxes of chocolate (he couldn't decide between them apperently) and also mum got me chocolates as well :) Oh and she got a free phone with her plan and she gave it to me. It's one of those mp3 player phones from Nokia, it's great except I can't really work it out lol it's a lot more complicated than my last samsung phone. Dave cooked me dinner last night <3 my favourite - fettucine cabonara, he cooked it for me last year as well. Also this week marks us being together for two years now. Crazy I know.

Current Mood: restless restless
Current Music: watching tv lol

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So at work today I was once again rostered on until 1 and sure enough at twenty to one, the guy who was meant to start at one and close this arvo so I could go home calls and tells me he's really sick and can't come in! I call the other girl and shes at "school" when my friend later told me she saw her walking around the shopping centre we both work in!

So now I'm basically going crazy. I applied for a couple of jobs online this afternoon and one lady even called me back, the hours she needs suit me perfectly and the jobs similar to my old one so it would probably be pretty ideal. I did a quick over the phone interview and now I'm doing the whole I should have said that and oh no I hope she doesn't think I meant this...etc etc. Oh well she said she will call back if she wants me to come in for an interview next week. I just can't take my job anymore.

This weeks really sad, I have 3 friends who are moving away for uni. One has already left to Queensland, one leaves on Sunday and the other leaves to New Zealand on Tuesday. I feel so pressured to see before they leave and I'm really busy, I hate when people move away :( The worst thing is I've only just started seeing them all again recently.
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Everything has been making me crazy. I hate my job so much, we have 3 staff and the other two people I work with are hopeless. They never do any work and half the time they don't even show up for shifts. It's really pissing me off because yesterday I was meant to finish at two yesterday and I didn't get to leave until 3 because the other girl didn't show up so we had to fins someone else to work. I miss my old manager she was awesome, we're meant to be getting a new one soon. Also the pays so crap, it's like the absolute minimun, there's probably 15 year olds who get paid more than me! Also because I'm starting school next week it mean's I'm only going to have the weekends and mondays to work and well that mean's I'm going to get like 12 hours a week and on shit pay that's not enough! I probably have to get a night job, but I hate the thought of waitressing, it makes me so nervous, but I need money argh.

So I had orientation for school today, I'm looking forward to starting next week. I met one girl who seems pretty nice and there's another girl from my high school in my class. We weren't really friends but we never hated each other or anything. I also saw another girl that I used to be friends with walking around campus, our friendship ended on really bad terms so I'm really hoping I don't come across her too often. At least she's not doing the same coarse as me!

Current Mood: weird weird

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I really need to update more, I'm just too lazy. A lot of things happen I mean to write about, I've always been like this. I have like 4325 diaries and journals I've used maybe 5 times.

I'm working heaps at the moment as our manager has gone to another store for a few weeks in fact she might not be coming back at all. So we only have 3 staff, I'm loving it though, I love both the people I work with and I'm getting plenty of hours. Things will be different went school starts up again though and I'm worried I won't be getting enough hours. Will just have to see how things go.

I'm so ridiculously lazy! It's driving me insane. My room is an absolute mess and has been for like 3 months. It just keeps getting worse and I keep on setting aside a time to do it and then always thinkinhg of another stupid excuse as to why I don't want to do it. Also I'm slipping back into my terrible eating habits, I went out and bought a diet book and I really want to lose weight but I just dont have the will power. I can never stick to anything, I'm so impatient. That and I love eating!

Things with Dave are a little weird at the moment. Lately I've been feeling a bit funny when I think about him. I know I still love him, but he really doesn't treat me that well and we always fight. Everyday we have really big fights and I always end up really upset and feeling completely hopeless, we can never resolve anything and I truely feel like he's one of the most difficult and unreasonable people I have ever met. He has a really terrible temper and when he gets angry he says really horrible things to me. It makes things so hard :( I don't know what to do. I love him and care about him but I feel like I'm kind of miserable. I can't even imagine my life without him because for the last two years he's been everything to me. I want us to work because when things are good they're really good but I feel like they're bad more than they are good. I don't know maybe we need some time apart.

Current Mood: worried worried

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Happy new year...very late I know. I have been sort of busy, work's pretty crazy as my mangers been called into another store. I've been working nearly every day but only for a few hours. I've been spending a fair bit of time with some old friends too, and I mean old friends, as in friends I havn't properly spoken to in like 2 years. So that's been interesting.

There is like nothing to drink in my house, just water and milk..all I could find that tastes nice is a can of bourbon and coke and I'm drinking it now...not really a fan.

Current Mood: blah blah
Current Music: watching the Simpsons

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Well looks like I won't be having a very exciting new years eve this year. I've been invited to my friend Melissa's dinner for her birthday but that will finish at like 8:30. I was meant to go to a friend's place for a party afterwards which I was really looking forward to but she cancelled today which really sucks. Dave is probably going to go clubbing with his mates so yeah I guess at midnight I'll be fast asleep! Oh well.

This afternoon I was driving home from Dave's and there was a massive storm! There was hail and everything I was freaking out but I just went a little slower than usual lol. I'm home by myself tonight and I really need to clean my room, it's so messy, I can hardly bring myself to look at it at the moment.
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Merry Christmas! (a bit late I know!)

My Christmas wasn't too exciting. On Christmas Eve we just had a curry for dinner and my brother and I went for a drive to look at the houses that are decorated with Christmas lights and everything. That was fun we used to do it when I was younger so it was nice to do it again and some people really go all out with the decorations and whatnot, but the houses look really gorgeous and the streets were packed with people.

On Christmas Day we just woke up (my mum, brother and I) and opened our presents. I got seat covers, 8 dvds, choclates (too much chocolate!) some eye shadow and Jason also got me a street directory to go in my car. Dave got me this satin nighty which we both picked out. We went to lunch at our old friend's and of coarse I ate far too much. We're talking pork, crackling, turkey, potatoe salada, noodle salad, chips, dip! Then trifle and pavlova for dessert! I felt a little over full for the rest of the day. We had dinner here at home and my mum invited some people over which was alright.

Christmas always seems to be over so quickly, it's kind of sad.
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I'm stressing out. Christmas is so soon and I still have to get presents for everyone. I feel like I'm not going to have enough time or money. I'm really rubbish at budgeting and now that I have a car I really need to learn how to save my money properly. Me and Bec have gone shopping once a week nearly every week for like a year and I really can't afford to do that anymore! It's really hard because I just want to buy new stuff all the time and I can't! I just need to hold out until after Christmas. But I have to be able to afford petrol too!

Driving is making me crazy, Dave keeps telling me I'm a bad driver and whenever he's with me in the car I get really nervous and feel like I'm being tested. It's really making things hard and I keep making mistakes when he's with me. I don't feel 100% confident driving and I feel like he's making it worse. Whenever I try to talk to him about it we just end up arguing and I end up crying. I hate it.

I got into the coarses I want to do next year, I'm probably going to do community welfare. But the worst thing is I think I'm having second thoughts again! I hate trying to decide what I want to for a career, I don't feel like anything really really appeals to me so I just keep guessing.

Current Mood: stressed stressed

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Okay so I actually miss school. At least I had something to do when I had classes and assignments and stuff. I love having my car but the truth is I don't ever get to use it because I have nowhere to go. I've been working a fair bit, but this week I've only got 3 shifts. I don't mind going to work though, it certainly is good to get out of the house and I love the money. Apart from working I'm doing like nothing at all. I drive whenever mum or Dave want to go somewhere and it's getting better, I have even driven by myself a few times which was nervewrecking at first but definetely got easier. I just need to practice parking really.

Today was so boring, I managed to clean out my entire bathroom cupboard, I have so much makeup and skincare stuff that I never use. It amazes me how much money I have wasted on useless beauty products which are now going into the rubbish.
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